Landon Donovan's Gold Cup Adventure of Epic Broportions

Landon Donovan is with the U.S. National team as they crisscross the country on their Gold Cup campaign, which means it's time for another epic adventure like his English and World Cup spectaculars last year. The following is Landon's correspondence with his friends and family back home in California.

Brahskis,

What’s lush? I’m just out here taking a break from from that California sunshine so I could get my Gold Cup stuntshine on. Off to an ill start. The boys dropped a 2-nil on the hockey-bronis from Canada in game 1. Had to listen to mad Eminem to get jacked up because we were in Detroit. Epic pregame playlist. Once the earbuds were out we just dominated those kids. They can’t just come out here thinking it’s gonna be the Stanley cup finals all over again and their gonna be dangling the twig and puck making us all look like fools. No shot. This is soccer, America’s game since LD started putting in work. They have like one good player, Dwyane De Brosario, that guy loves pulling up from deep and trying to rip twine for the people. He’s got mad steeze on his goal dance too. Trying to translate those moves to the bar scene and put it down on some mamis.

Anyway. We’ve got a little lay-off here until the next matchski. We’re beating Panama in 3 days. Should be a classic Fraturday. All the boys out and flyin' around knockin' g-notes in. Bud bottles after the game for sure. If you’re not on board you better get with the program, son. In the mean time we’re straight chaying in Tampa. This place is actually pretty legit, they’ve got nudie bars on like every other block. So yeah, we’re just gonna chill it and kill it for awhile here, we’re all pretty much just waiting for the final vs the mexibros anyway. That Little Pee bro thinks he’s got some serious swag droppin hat-tricks and ish. Gonna have to remind that youngin' that CONCACAF is still mine. I run this.  I’m the bro-president of this entire thing on the reg. You know what it is.

Peace out. One love. 

Leila Arcieri Kate Mara Izabella Scorupco Carla Campbell Penélope Cruz